Why do people never talk about the part of depression when you just don’t want anything anymore? Everybody talks about when it hurts like hell, when you cry, when you cut, when you take drugs, when you break down. But no one ever talks about when you just lay down in your room, with a hole inside of you that you don’t know how to fill, and you don’t want to do anything even the things you usually like. So you just spend your day kinda waiting for it to end. And it’s horrible because you feel empty and guilty for that at the same time.
There needs to be more awareness of this kind of depressed state. It’s often the kind that is mistaken for laziness. I call it “A” depression, and I know it personally. The symptoms are apathy and anhedonia: Apathy (lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern and anhedonia ( the inability to experience pleasure from activities usually found enjoyable).
So ummm gosh i dont really know how to do/say stuff like this……
ok so basically…. i. i have a head full of rotting teeth that i cant afford to get fixed. + my top 4 need to be removed. yesterday i found out what all needed to be done and how much it would cost. i have insurance but that only covers…lets see … 4 teeth a year. 4 A YEAR. and that dose not include the 4 i need pulled.
im just barely an adult, i have no job nor can i get one cause i have no transportation or a diploma. im a wreck i have no idea what to do and my depression has skyrocketed. im terrified.
i just feel numb…..
From now on im going to do nothing but focus on getting commissions up and finishing my closed species so i can get those up and running for adopts. all of my personal art will be put on hold. im gonna try as much as i can to make as much as i can. Im also probably not going to be taking part in artfight this year as i need that time for commissions.
i hate doing this but im gonna just leave this here
i hate that i’m so absent as a person. i don’t start conversations. i can barely maintain them. i’m so weary and spaced out all the time to the point where i can’t even keep up small talk and i’m just so disappointed in myself