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When someone walks slower than me:
omfg your slow ass is clogging up the hallway for the rest of us put some pep in your step grandma
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When someone walks faster than me:
jesus christ are you on the run from the police this isn't a race you can tone it down usain bolt
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When someone walks at the same pace as me:
who gave your creepy ass permission to walk with me get the fuck away before I call the cops
